Let’s Set Some Boundaries for Social Media

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Bullying, Bullying in Solcial Media, meme, Meme Controversy, Olympic Athlete Meme Controversy, Olympic Athletes, Olympic Games Social Media, Social Media Boundaries, Social Parody

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Okay, am I the only person who feels that the situation with the use of McKayla Maroney’s image of her on the podium, scowling, while accepting the silver medal for the women’s vault in the Olympics is unfair?  That it is inappropriate? That the use of her not-to-pleased, would-rather-be-elsewhere expression used so extensively as a meme is akin to picking on her?  And isn’t picking on someone also called bullying?

Personally, I am surprising myself with this one. I tend to feel rather a lack of sympathy with U.S. athletes.  As a humble and “polite” Canadian, who according to @Stats_Can “says sorry over 45,000 times a day.”  I generally find the high level of confidence and self-esteem consistently exhibited by U.S. athletes comes across as attitude, bordering on arrogant and unsportsmanlike-like.

First of all, McKayla Maroney is only 16.  I don’t think we can hold her to the same level of maturity that we can her older counterparts.  She was suffering a huge disappointment, and interviews indicate the focus of her disappointment was herself.  Consensus is that she was the favourite to take the gold and had not missed the second vault landing in several months. As a result, any one of us in the same situation would have been pissed at ourselves.

I agree that it’s important to maintain a professional demeanor, however these athletes are human, under incredible pressure to perform, are far from home, in a different time zone, climate, environment and, some of them, like McKayla, are still only children.

How many of the athletes did we see express deep, even devastating disappointment?  One that I personally witnessed was Saturday in the men’s platform diving.   Favourite Qiu Bo, who led both of the preliminaries and semi-final as the top qualifier was beaten by American David Boudia in the last attempt.  I saw the 19-year-old give way to tears.

I admire how McKayla has not let being the butt of jokes and the subject of multiple parody’s get to her.  It’s a sign of maturity and resilience, being able to see past the last mistake, accept it and move on – even when faced with constant reminders.  She’s even had some fun with it.  Which is a good way of getting your own back and refusing to let others take your power away from you.

But I do seriously think we should have some ground rules for choosing the subject of our humour.  I believe there is some judgment called for in cases like this.  I would argue that we need to establish some limits.  That not everything that is “public” is free for the taking.

What a can of worms I am opening up!  Who should decide?  Who should enforce?  Who’s standards do we assess by.  All legitimate questions.  All difficult to answer.  I have a few initial suggestions for consideration.

For a start, I think there should be age limits.  For example in Canada, the legal age is 18 and over.  So McKayla’s image would not have been available for use, because she is only 16.  As there are exceptions to every rule, if the person is already a celebrity, in the public eye, or on a reality show, then perhaps their age can be disregarded.

I believe we need to determine a clear line where there would be some consideration or respect for privacy.  I believe that a photo taken in what is considered a private moment, should not be used to make fun of or belittle the subject of the photo.  For example, entering or exiting a washroom/dressing room/changing room.

I think there needs to be a sensitivity to disabilities, disaster and perhaps, death.

I would hate to be a part of Social Media that preyed on the young and the weak and the disadvantaged, the members of the population that are vulnerable, unprotected and ignorant.

Yes, it will be difficult to agree upon limits and it will be a challenge to resist sharing, but in Social Media, if it’s not viewed, passed on, tweeted or posted, the lifespan of news is short.  I guess what I’m advocating for is a “ban” on material that is tasteless, cruel, exploitative and derogatory.  I’m asking that we self-censor and just not pass it on.  Because if we don’t share, then it has no validation, no encouragement, no life.

There is so much good about Social Media.  But there is so much potential for bad too.  Let’s not make it easy for the bad, or allow it to be easily perpetuated.

On a personal note, and related to facial expression, I have a habit of rolling my eyes.  If I hear something that strikes me as improbable, ridiculous, patently untrue or insincere, I do the eye roll.  I swear it is totally involuntary. It used to drive some of my sales colleagues crazy and I got shit for it, but I am an adult, and I agree that, in theory, I should know better and be able to control my telling body language.

As a result, it irks me to no end that it was very an effective element in Anastasia’s Steele’s conquest of Christian Grey.  When she rolled her eyes, he found it provocative and sexy. I guess I will just have to wait and see how it works for me in other situations, as what ticks one person off, may be attractive to another.

I won’t hold my breath!

Writing on the Blackboard of Life

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Athletes Tweet, Communicating via Social Media, Olympic Athletes Twitter Controversy, Olympic Twitter Controversy, Olympics PR, Twitter Controvery at Olympics

Photo Credit: pueri87@hotmail.com

Are there still blackboards in classrooms?  I haven’t been back to school in a while, but I would have to assume so.

One of my strongest, most vivid memories is of being called upon in class to go up to the blackboard and solve an equation.  I remember the huge butterflies caused by a multitude of feelings: pleasure because I was picked; shyness at having to go to the front of the class where my every move would be scrutinized; the nervousness of making sure I did the math correctly because sometimes, when I didn’t concentrate, I was a bit sloppy.

I clearly recall how tiny I felt, how exposed and vulnerable, standing at the front of the room with my back to everyone.  How my neck burned and prickled with the weight of the 30 pairs of eyes watching me.  How hard I had to concentrate to make sure I was focusing on the problem and solving it properly.  How momentous it was in my mind, as if seconds had slowed to a crawl and the whole world had stopped to watch me work.

It was a powerful mixture of emotion.  The fear of failure and potential of embarrassment was almost intolerable.

I’m sure that almost everyone has had a similar experience.  I just wish everyone could remember the feeling, because this feeling is important.  It’s what keeps us humble, careful and mindful.

This is the feeling that one should have in mind as they are getting ready to tweet, update Facebook, post or comment on a blog, or otherwise send their missive out into the wide, public space of the humongous network that is Social Media.

This feeling of scrutiny, of being weighted and measured, evaluated and considered is key – because it happens.  Just because you’re invisible and anonymous at your keyboard, or on your smart phone, does not mean that your comments aren’t heard, seen, noted.  That they don’t affect people, incite reactions; that they don’t have consequences.

They do.

Greek triple-jumper Voula Papachristou, who’s hopes for gold will not be realized this Olympics because of an ill-considered tweet now understands this; Swiss soccer player Michel Morganella who was expelled for his tweet also realizes what carelessness means.  Years of preparation, sacrifice and dreams destroyed by 140 characters.

Then there is Hope Solo, keeper for the U.S. women’s soccer team, whose public disrespect of Brandi Chastain’s commentary about Saturday’s game versus Columbia was outright outrageous.  Brandi Chastain is an analyst at the Olympics for NBC, formerly of the U.S. women’s soccer team and hero of the 1999 Women’s World Cup, where she scored the winning goal.

But Hope Solo?  No discipline for her.  I guess it’s okay when you insult your own countryman and team alumna.

Social media is the blackboard of life.  You may think you are making a passing comment, a quick remark that will disappear into obscurity.  You may be right, but if your tweet or post is controversial enough, or someone pulls it into the public arena, it may remain in the minds and hearts of a multitude of people for a long, long time.

Do you want to be remembered for making the Olympic team or for being sent home?  For being an integral member of the winning team, or the witch that threw stones at a successful predecessor?

The coverage I’ve seen indicates that the Olympic athletes have been well trained on giving interviews.  The comments are positive, non-critical and overall respectful, modest, gracious and considered.

My question is, have they been given training or guidelines on how to use social media?  I have to believe this should have been done.

If not, I’d ask them to think back to the first time they were called up to the front of the class to write on the blackboard.  And I’d have them conjure up that feeling of import and responsibility each time they hit the button on the device that allows them to write on the blackboard of life.